Adult
When did I become an adult? When did you become an adult?
I’ll bet if I asked most people, I’d get answers like, “When I graduated High School…” or, “ When I moved out on my own…” or even, “When I graduated college…”
To be honest, I didn’t consider myself an adult after any of those milestones. I clearly remember graduating from college and standing in front of high school students teaching them math and not feeling like an adult. In fact, I’d say I made the opposite mistake of thinking that we were almost peers being close in age (it’s hard to keep control of a high school class of kids when they sense you are not the adult in charge). Even after we got married, I remember talking with my wife and asking her if she felt like an adult (she didn’t). We made financial decisions (good and bad), had jobs, paid bills and made plans but still did not feel like we reached adulthood.
I’d even say that even after the birth of our son, I’m not sure I felt like an adult. However, I can say I didn’t feel like a kid anymore either. Somewhere over the first several years of our sons life, I gradually started to feel more like an adult. Then we moved to New Orleans and were 12 hours away from our families for the first time in our lives and that, in my assessment, clinched the deal - we became adults.
“Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature.” - 1 Corinthians 14:20 ESV
“About this we have much to say, and it is hard to explain, since you have become dull of hearing. For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need milk, not solid food, for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.” - Hebrews 5:11-14
“A son honors his father, and a servant his master. If then I am a father, where is my honor? And if I am a master, where is my fear? says the Lord of hosts to you, O priests, who despise my name. But you say, ‘How have we despised your name?’ By offering polluted food upon my altar. But you say, ‘How have we polluted you?’ By saying that the Lord’s table may be despised. When you offer blind animals in sacrifice, is that not evil? And when you offer those that are lame or sick, is that not evil? Present that to your governor; will he accept you or show you favor? says the Lord of hosts. And now entreat the favor of God, that he may be gracious to us. With such a gift from your hand, will he show favor to any of you? says the Lord of hosts. Oh that there were one among you who would shut the doors, that you might not kindle fire on my altar in vain! I have no pleasure in you, says the Lord of hosts, and I will not accept an offering from your hand.” - Malachi 1:6-10 ESV
For me, being a dad and taking care of my family finally encouraged me to grow up and accept that I was an adult. As I read how young people are delaying getting married and having kids, I wonder if they are trading short term frivolity for long term emotional growth.
