Laundry Pods
Our son, his wife and our granddaughter came to visit, and, like most grandparents, we always look forward to their visit. However, we are far removed from the daily activity of a family with small children.
Yesterday, after they left, I took our laundry down to wash and saw my daughter-in-law had put the cap on the laundry pod container I had put to the side when I initially opened it. At first, I felt a slight tinge of guilt that I hadn’t considered the safety of our 5-year-old granddaughter (or any other kid who visits us) when storing our laundry pods.
That’s when my memory started drifting to my own childhood. You see, my parents, and I think a lot of parents of that generation, operated under the philosophy of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” By that, I mean my parents didn’t prioritize constant activities that today’s parents manage. Sure, I played Korey League and was in Cub Scouts and 4-H, but there were large chunks of the year I played or read books or watched whatever my dad was watching on TV. I rode my bike upwards of 30 miles in a day with my rural friends.
In fact, when I got my driver’s license and my own car, I not only got a job (I was responsible for paying for my gas, license plates, maintenance, insurance, etc.) but I also signed up for Boy Scouts, a play (Don Juan) and a musical (Bye, Bye, Birdie) as extracurricular activities. (Remember, I’m an introvert, so even I knew by then I needed to push myself outside of my comfort zone.) My parents’ only rule was that I let them know where I was going and what time I’d be home. (By the way, my sister had more rules to follow than I did, which she attributed to being a girl, but I attributed it to her maturity.)
I was working (as a senior in high school), and after work we went four-wheeling with the assistant manager for a couple of hours south of town. His Jeep, unfortunately, had a problem locking into four-wheel drive and we got stuck in a mud hole around 1:00 a.m. (I think I told my mom I’d be home around 2:00 a.m.) By the time I walked out of the woods and drove home, it was almost 5:00 a.m. My mom was waiting for me on the sidewalk by our door. We discussed how she wasn’t mad that I got home so late, but was worried about not knowing where I was (this was decades before cell phones).
My point is that today’s parents are much more involved in every detail of their kids’ lives than my parents were in mine. In retrospect, I think my parents instilled independence and self-determination in me and gave me a good example of how to develop as a person. I don’t feel cheated at all. After all, they didn’t have me just to have an enjoyable experience, but to create a productive and faithful adult. I pray they succeeded.
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” - Ephesians 6:1-4 ESV
“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower is the slave of the lender. Whoever sows injustice will reap calamity, and the rod of his fury will fail. Whoever has a bountiful eye will be blessed, for he shares his bread with the poor. Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease. He who loves purity of heart, and whose speech is gracious, will have the king as his friend. The eyes of the Lord keep watch over knowledge, but he overthrows the words of the traitor. The sluggard says, “There is a lion outside! I shall be killed in the streets!” The mouth of forbidden women is a deep pit; he with whom the Lord is angry will fall into it. Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. Whoever oppresses the poor to increase his own wealth, or gives to the rich, will only come to poverty.” - Proverbs 22:6-16
Ironically, our son told us they had decided to try not to be as much of a helicopter parent as they had been. I may not agree with all their parenting decisions, but I have faith and confidence that they will do what they think is best for our granddaughters. Who could ask for anything more?
