Rant

A day or two ago, some court in California, I think, ruled against Meta (Facebook) with a large judgment because Meta didn’t do enough to protect children who use the social media platform. At the time, I didn’t think much about it because it was clear the case was going to be appealed to a higher court, so I knew we would have years before the ramifications of this and like cases are felt. (I should state I really don’t know the arguments brought up in the suit.)

This morning, while I was dressing, I had one of the talking-head news shows on and they invited parents interested in the case to discuss the particulars. These three parents all articulated the harm and parental challenges associated with raising young people with these social media platforms. What none of the parents addressed, except on the flimsiest basis, was their responsibilities in raising and protecting their children from misuse of these platforms.

This made me think of three experiences I had with this responsibility from my past.

The first was when, as a young teen, my mom made me return the book Jaws to the library. I never considered my parents overly strict. In fact, I’ve described them as letting me make my own decisions as long as I respected their trust in my actions. In this case, my mom told me to return the book to the library because the content wasn’t appropriate for my young mind (if you’ve never read the book, the first chapter is “spicy”). My mom didn’t need a law to restrict access or even to pressure the library into requiring some kind of parental approval mechanism. She was interested enough in what I was reading and made me return the book when she thought it wasn’t appropriate.

The second experience was when our son was a teenager. He wanted a CD by a certain artist. (I don’t remember who the artist was, but I’d bet he does.) Our niece, who is about five years older than him, mentioned to us that the CD contained explicit language. He did not get the CD. However, I later purchased the edited version for him from Walmart. Again, I didn’t need a law or regulation to keep the explicit music from our son. I just needed to be an involved and caring parent and make decisions on his behalf.

The third example involves my sister and, at the time, my 8-year-old niece. My sister got my niece her first cell phone (this was before “smartphones”) when she was 8. We had just gotten our 14-year-old son his first cell phone and were questioning whether he truly needed it. I questioned my sister’s rationale, and she made the case that my niece needed it for situations like when she and her friends wanted to walk around the mall to let her know when to pick her up. While I didn’t argue much with their decision, all I could think of was that an 8-year-old didn’t have the maturity to have such a powerful piece of equipment at her disposal, and the rationale my sister gave for getting it allowed her to tune out of the goings on of my niece's choices.

Don’t get me wrong, I believe the government should help protect people from harm. I support (but don’t like) speed limits and I believe schools should censor material available to students.

However, we are trying to replace parental involvement and responsibility with law and regulation. I believe this to be more detrimental in the long run. Parents should be empowered and responsible for keeping track of what their child is doing. Technology makes this more difficult and more important.

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ (this is the first commandment with a promise), ‘that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.’ Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” - Ephesians‬ ‭6‬:‭1‬-‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

“The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. When the wicked increase, transgression increases, but the righteous will look upon their downfall. Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.” - Proverbs‬ ‭29‬:‭15‬-‭17‬‬‬‬‬‬‬

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” - Proverbs‬ ‭22‬:‭6‬‬‬‬‬

Candidate Hillary Clinton was once quoted as saying it takes a community to raise a child. When I considered all the people in my community, I quickly realized that I wasn’t willing to let everyone participate on the same level in raising my child. There are some people I trust more than others and some people I want to keep my child away from as long as possible.

Ok, rant over.