Jobs, Part 4
When I graduated college, I had three possible paths I could take. The first one was that I was accepted, with a scholarship, to a graduate math program at the University of Oklahoma. The second was a High School teaching position in Barrington, Illinois (a suburb of Chicago). The third, and the one I picked, was a High School teaching position in Pleasant Plains, Illinois.
The irony of that third option was that this was the high school I had gone to. It was also very close to my girlfriend who in short order became my wife.
I remember my first day of teaching. The shop teacher (remember I had gone to school there so I knew almost all the teachers by their last name) came up to me and told him I could thank him. He was on the union negotiating team and they had recently concluded the negotiations resulting in a small increase for all. There was something about the good ‘ole boy way he told me I should thank him that has turned off of unions since then.
The second thing I remember was my first experience in the teacher’s lounge. Smoking was still allowed in the teacher’s lounge at that time and since I smoked, I was ready to go there during my free period.
I was a motivated student in high school (in fact, I’m still an enthusiastic learner) so I genuinely respected and looked up to all my teachers. Walking into the teacher’s lounge that first time and seeing the teachers who I respected moan and complain about the kids they were teaching was almost too much to handle. That’s when reality told me that my altruistic Imagination of what teaching was going to be like was different than reality.
“Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” - Isaiah 55:6-9 ESV
“Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways! “For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been his counselor?” “Or who has given a gift to him that he might be repaid?” For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.” - Romans 11:33-36
Too many times have I wanted to pick and choose who God is to redefine him into my imaginary role. I want all the good stuff - the love and salvation - but light on the picking up my cross and following him part. But just like my teacher’s lounge experience, my imaginative role is wrong.
“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel. The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust. As for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more. But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children’s children, to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments. The Lord has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all.” - Psalm 103:1-19
While my utopian expectation of teaching was wrong, I found other aspects to be joyful in experiencing. I believe with my whole heart that if I love God for who he is, I will find unimaginable joy that I could have never imagined.
